Readers, if you have been wondering why you have not been receiving your regular dose of wonderful Head To The Net posts, it is because we here at HTTN are relaunching the website. I have put the articles on hold until the new look and feel is unveiled, but this is too important to wait.
Tiger Woods, the recovering sex addict and best golfer in the world who is set to resume his playing career at The Masters today, is undergoing an image transformation. The new Nike television commercial features the voice of his late father, Earl Woods. Tiger has said that he wished his father was still around to straighten him out (I paraphrase). All voice clips in this commercial are real, and they are put together in such a way that it looks like Woods Sr. is talking to his son about his recent indescretions. And Tiger looks like any boy being reprimanded by the old man.
As you hear the voice of the departed speaking with an eerily omnipotent air, can't you just imagine that Tiger still hears his father speaking to him very often, with words very similar to these? See for yourself:
"I felt entitled."
During his closed door, no questions allowed “public” address three weeks ago, Tiger Woods used this reasoning to explain the choices he had made over the last two years. In his first interview since the incident just released by ESPN on Sunday, March 22, he again cited entitlement as his downfall.
If you haven’t seen it yet, check out the interview here:
The Breakdown
The combination of his previously aired public statement and this seemingly staged interview shows me that Woods continues to feel entitled. Because he is the most famous athlete in the world, he thinks he can answer his own set of questions to his own set of reporters. And he feels entitled to make his comeback at the single most controlled tournament of the year – reporters have been banned from Augusta for life for simply insulting the quality of the grass.
The Eyes
Why does it look like Woods’ eyes were intentionally pepper sprayed prior to the interview? Are we supposed to feel like he’s been crying for 4 months straight? Or that this is what a person looks like after going through 45 days of in-patient therapy? This attempt to evoke a sense of sympathy within only makes people angry.
The Answer
Tiger, until you tell the world how you came to crash your Escalade into a tree, and what it is you’re even being treated for, people are going to guess. They will keep drawing conclusions and continue making jokes. And although TMZ and ET are pretty harsh, you created this monster with your actions. When you were perfect, you were allowed space and put on a pedestal, but it’s gone now.
The time has come to lower yourself to the level of the fans: open up; be real. If you do, the public will open up their arms and help you get back to what you want to be.
"I can't suspend Matt Cooke for being a repeat offender, I have to find a reason. Right now our rules say that shoulders to head are legal." – NHL Head Disciplinarian, Colin Campbell, explaining the non-suspension to Matt Cooke.
Mr. Campbell, there’s also nothing in the rule book saying that I can’t poke the butt end of my stick into a player’s left eye. There are a lot of things that aren’t explicitly laid out in the rule book, but the rules do explicitly say that a player should not intentionally commit an act that could injure another. Is this not precisely why there is an NHL disciplinarian – to watch and police the rules of the game?
You’ve probably seen it many times, but here is another look at Cooke’s hit on Marc Savard:
Campbell compared it to a hit by Mike Richards on David Booth from earlier in the season in which he also handed out no suspension. He stated that since there was no punishment for that hit, the NHL had to be consistent and not discipline Cooke for the hit in question.
For comparison, here’s a look at Richards’ hit:
In conclusion, upon taking a closer look at the Cooke hit, he comes from the side at a player who doesn’t even have the puck, and he means to injure him. Not any regular, measurable injury either, like a broken bone or a sprain, this is a blow to the most delicate, important part of the body.
There should have been a suspension on both hits, and it should have sent a message. Unfortunately, the message now sent is this: “Until the end of the 2009-10 season, take your liberties with people’s heads. We can do nothing to stop you!”
For more on my thoughts on the headshot epidemic, read my previous post on headshots here.
The Vancouver Canucks lead the entire NHL in third period comebacks with 10 this season. 3 of them have come in the 5 games since the Olympic break. Punctuated by Tuesday’s 6-4 win, in which the team trailed twice by 3 goals, everyone is wondering how they’re able to keep doing it. Here are five theories:
1. Now that the players are past the Olympics and the substance testing, the Canucks’ Olympians are taking full advantage, and like BC Bud, BC Sudafed is the most potent stuff you can find.
2. The Canucks are attempting to single handedly reverse the over-referenced stat: “The team that scores the first goal of the game usually wins.”
3. Since the Olympic games, Roberto Luongo has been trying to emulate the thrill he felt in the gold medal game. The following conversation was overheard in the dressing room after Tuesday’s 3 goal comeback:
Henrik Sedin: So is that how the gold medal game felt, Roberto?
Roberto Luongo: Not even close, buddy.
(at the other end of the room Ryan Kesler growls and breaks a hockey stick over his knee)
4. The boys get sh*ts and giggles from seeing Vigneault’s head looking like it’s going to explode, and they keep one upping each other to make it happen. Case in point – the sharp angle goal let in by Luongo from Colorado’s Chris Stewart - he obviously let it in on purpose. Mason Raymond took it too far with the blatant giveaway at his own blueline, though, and he paid for it by only being played for one shift in the entire third period.
5. I went through the Sedins’ contracts and found this interesting tidbit:
“The Player shalt be paid a bonus in the amount of $100 for every point scored in the third period. If thou scores a point in either the first or the second period, nary a bonus shall be paid!”
I also discovered that NHL contracts are written in old Shakespearian English – who knew?
Tragedies struck, conflicts arose, and rain fell, but like a determined athlete battling adversity, the Vancouver Olympic Games met all challenges head on and rose high above them. And here we are, at the end of two weeks, with our highest medal tally ever, and the most gold medals ever won at a Winter Games. Winning, does it make such a difference to our country? Taking a stroll down Granville Street on Saturday night might have left you deaf from all the Canadian chants. Spontaneous outbursts of "Oh Canada" would echo in your ears. Canada's athletes, to a man, said that they were competing for us. The medal winners won for us, and we graciously accepted and stood next to them on the podiums. When Alexandre Bilodeau's grin stretched from ear to ear, couch-prone Canadians across the country smiled with him. As Kevin Martin finally achieved redemption after eight long years of waiting, Canada itself felt redeemed. And when Joannie Rochette showed us the true meaning of courage, continuing to compete after losing her mother halfway through the games, we watched over her, lifting her onto the podium with all our thoughts and prayers. For two weeks, our nation has been united. For two weeks, we've all been pulling the rope in the same direction. There is nothing else that can unite such a massive, diverse group in celebration. Nothing but sports has the power, and nothing but the Olympic Games has the breadth. "I Believe," CTV's Olympic slogan could not have been better chosen. We have become a country of believers. Our heros have inspired and united everyone, from the young to the old, and our country is a happier place than before. What a difference two weeks can make. 
I think I speak for all Canadians when I say no one saw this coming. In the lead up to the Vancouver 2010 Olympics, who could have ever predicted the two weeks we've had? The world has seen a side of our wonderful country that rarely shows its head, and what a triumph it has been: a celebration of sports, a celebration of athletes and individuals, and a celebration of a proud, joyous nation.
"The sport took a step backward. Brian Boitano did the same thing, technically, in 1988. There are junior skaters who can skate that same program," he stated in his column on Yahoo.com. Perhaps he has a point. Imagine if the scoring system in the Snowboarding halfpipe gave more points for five 360's than a double mctwist 1260 (Shaun White's signature move)? Boarders like Shaun would realize that trying to pull of risky moves that sap tons of energy are hardly worth it, and would go for more variety. According to Stojko, a similar thing is happening in skating, and the athletes are not being encouraged to push the envelope. If you want to read his angry tirade against the current scoring system put in place by the ISU, click here. He closes by saying "I am going to watch hockey, where athletes are allowed to push the envelope. A real sport." No argument from me there, Elvis! 
One day after Even Lysacek beat Evgeni Plushenko for the gold medal in men's figure skating, Elvis Stojko had harsh words for the current state of figure skating. He was incensed with the fact that Plushenko landed two quad jumps in his two programs and still lost to a skater whose program had a lower degree of difficulty.
Manny if you win, here are some ideas for your victory celebration: If anyone has any more ideas for Manny, feel free to add them below! GO MANNY GO!
Manuel Osborne-Paradis is my newest follower on twitter, so I'm dedicating this post to him. Racing in the Men's Downhill on Saturday morning, he will aim to become the first Canadian to win a gold medal on home snow, and our entire nation is behind him.
As this is a sports blog and I cover everything in the sports world, I would not be doing my due diligence on the Olympics if I did not research the other countries fully. I begin with 4 U.S. Olympians. I won't bog you down with stats and numbers, rather let's first get to know their appearance, so that if we run into them on the street, mountain, or hot tub at Whistler, we will know of whose presence we are in.
1. Lindsay Vonn - Skier
FYI - The four athletes recently did a shoot for the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition.
2. Claire Bidez - Snowboarder
The photoshoot took place at Whistler, B.C.!! Why was I not invited?
3. Lacy Schnoor - Skier 
I am going to Whistler during the Olympics to find them.
4. Hannah Teter - Snowboarder
If you want to see more, and I see no reason why you shouldn't, click here for the SI Swimsuit Edition website.
Up here in the Olympic City, we aren't able to see the famous Super Bowl Commercials. So just to make it easier for you to find them, I've posted some of the best ones below. But, let's start with the ad that we saw over and over instead - the CTV Olympic Anthem. Click here to see it. What can I say... I beleive.
1. Doritos Crash the Superbowl Contest Winners:
2. Brett Favre Staves off Retirement - Hyundai Commercial:
3. Bridgestone - Tires or your Life:
4. David Letterman, Oprah - (the impression is hillarious):
Let me know if I've missed any good ones!
It has been well publicized that Tiger Woods is receiving treatment from a Sex Addiction Therapy Clinic in Mississippi. Every patient of the clinic is asked to fill out a questionnaire upon arrival, and Head To the Net's undercover research crew incredibly managed to obtain a copy of Woods'. Our source cannot be revealed, but let's just say a former X-Files superstar isn't too happy that he is not the world's premier sex addict anymore.
Farewell Dion Phaneuf, man of many names. In your second year christened 2-10, ADVERTISEMENT:
A poem, from the heart of a jaded Flames fan:
In season 2, acting as if you'd played 10.
'Twas an accurate name for your attitude,
Acting like you were an NHL veteran.
Characterized by the fans as Ion;
For "D" did not fit in your description.
Perhaps you should have been a forward,
As it's clear you're no defenseman.
Duhh-ion – always a fan favourite;
Who gave measured responses post-trade.
What might have been seen as emotion;
Was your mind struggling not to fade.
Finally, our dear Prima-Dion-a;
You used Gretzky's trade as comparison;
An insolent analogy at the least,
In the end, it only proves your delusion.
And we are happy to see your time here cease.
NOTE: Actually, I'm no Flames fan, as you well know from previous posts, but this is how they feel in Cow-town
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If Toronto and Vancouver could talk, and they had a conversation leading up to this Saturday's game between the Canucks and the Maple Leafs, it would probably go something like this: Vancouver: Hi Toronto Toronto: Oh hey little buddy! How's it going? Big game for your Canucks this weekend playing the Leafs, eh? How are you guys doing anyways? V: We're leading our division, and we're sixth in the NHL right now. T: Really? Who'd have known... V: We've got the best team in Canada! You don't even know how well the Canucks are playing right now? T: Nah. Last time we heard about you guys was when Ron MacLean was talking about that Burrows guy. Burrows – what a jerk eh? V: Seriously? Don't you know what happened after that? It was the biggest sports story here for two weeks! T: No idea. V: MacLean's interview with Colin Campbell was completely one sided! The Canucks even boycotted the CBC last week by doing no interviews. T: Really? We didn't even notice. You know no one past Alberta watches hockey after 10pm, right? So basically your team boycotted its own fans from interviews. V: Grrr... I HATE you Toronto! T: Haha, relax little guy! (Toronto ruffles Vancouver's hair. Vancouver scowls and pouts)
As I vegged out on my couch watching NFL football all day on Sunday, it If you don't see where this is going, let me explain: what's the average length of a play in football? 10 seconds? That's being generous. That's a long bomb touchdown pass from Payton Manning to Austin Collie including the 10 yard run into the end zone. Football is actually the reverse of all other sports – the gameplay simply serves as a timeout from the drinking. And boy do North Americans love their drinking. 2. It's all a ruse! "Sorry Honey, we can't go shopping for new duvet covers today, even though I know we need them. I'm watching sports with the guys." Sure you are, you average North American male. What a great excuse to sit around with the boys, shooting the shit, drinking, and doing nothing. On Sundays, we return to our days of college bliss – back when we had hours to waste away and no one nagging us to do errands. Female readers: disregard this paragraph, please. Let's be honest – of the NFL games we watch, how many do we really care about? Oh sure, we've all picked a team we claim to follow, and we cheer louder when they make a good play, but do we really care at the end of the day? Cowboys fans are a dime a dozen, but there are probably 10,000 die-hard fans whose mood will still be affected that night if they lose. Most football fans only care because they've got money on some outcome. They're not upset or excited about the SCORE, they're getting emotional over the money! 3. A Gambler's Paradise Which brings us to the last point: there are a million things to bet on in a football gam So there you go – when it comes to competing with the NFL juggernaut in North America, other sports are quite simply out of their league.
struck me that this was the best part of my week. I was in a happy place. Why? Well, it certainly wasn't because of the game that was on the screen in front of me.
1. The Beer:Sports Ratio 
own to dip your nacho or take a swig of beer can be disastrous, causing you to miss a key moment or a highlight reel play. So we wait. We wait until whistles, timeouts, commercial breaks – those 30 second breaks where we can quickly munch our hot dogs and wash it down with beer – and then it's back to business, back to the game.
e, and boy do we take advantage of them. Who will win the coin toss, who will score the first touchdown, what will the score be at the end of the first quarter, who will make the first sack, the possibilities are endless in this game. When we're hooting and hollering in front of the set, it's because we're either making money or losing money. We don't care that much about the teams! Why is it not the same when we're watching hockey? There's no time for bets! We can barely make it to the bathroom and back during a commercial break, let alone propose a bet, decide on odds, decide on the wager, and shake on it.
In a year when headshots have become a hockey topic too often discussed, Patrice Cormier, of the Rouyn-Noranda Huskies, has gone above and beyond what anyone thought possible by committing the most egregious of fouls. For anyone who has not seen his gruesome elbow on Mikael Tam of the Quebec Remparts, or would like to see it again, it is posted here:
The most immediate question on everyone’s mind, aside from concerns about Tam’s health, is how will the league punish Cormier? The goal of the reprimand is of course to deter this sort of behaviour in the future, and the thought is to make the suspension so long that other players will never do anything like it again. The question is, can suspensions and fines actually teach players to stop hurting each other? Wouldn’t it be better to somehow increase the level of respect for the fellow athlete, so that people are not so quick to hurt each other when the chance arises?
On Wednesday’s SportsCentre on TSN, hockey analyst Bob McKenzie stated that he would like to see more: “I know there are studies at Harvard University, Boston University, where athletes are donating their brains to science and they’re studying the ill effects of concussions. I’d like these kids that are guilty of headshots to go and find out the true impact of what they’re doing to someone else and give them a better understanding.”
An excellent idea, but why not take it a step further? Instead of teaching hockey players who have committed offences to learn about the results after the fact, why could we not set up a program to teach this information to all young hockey players? Perhaps in doing this, a greater sense of respect could be developed at a younger age, and instead of trying to punish headshots out of the game, we can take a more grassroots approach to educating them away.
The “Head Down” Mentality
There is another problem with the way today’s youth are taught to play. Hockey players are cultured to think that playing with your “head down” is a capital offense and anyone who does so should be taught a lesson. Really, what does “head down” even mean? In plain terms, it suggests that a player was most likely more focused on the puck than on his surroundings. The hockey mentality is that if an individual is not watching out for himself by being aware of those around him, he is a fair target, and the results are his problem. True enough – hockey players do need to be taught awareness for their own safety, but I have issue with the idea that because he is more focused on the puck, he should have his neck snapped back in a massive open ice hit.
If you think about it, the average player has his “head down” at many instances during a hockey game. Any time a forward takes a pass slightly behind him or in his feet, or if a puck is bouncing or rolling, a player must focus on it that much more to make sure he has control. During that moment, the player has his “head down”. Luckily, Scott Stevens is not always present at that split second to “teach him a lesson”. In my mind, the culture of hitting the unaware player as hard as possible because he deserves it for not looking up is just plain wrong. There are many ways to separate player from puck that don’t involve potential injury or concussion that would be just as effective, so why are we teaching young players that the big hit is the right play?
NHL headshots are a by-product of the hockey culture, and the only way for this to change is through enlightenment. Mikael Tam, Paul Kariya, Eric Lindros, Brett Lindros, Pascal Dupuis – anyone ever affected by a headshot – education is the way to salvation.
If any of you are not yet aware, Alexandre Burrows went off on quite a rant following Monday night's game against the Nashville Predators. He made serious allegations against one of the game's referee's, Stephane Auger, stating that, "It started in warm-up before the anthems. The ref came over to me and said I made him look bad in Nashville on the Smithson hit. He said he was going to get me back tonight, and he did his job in the third, I think." – as reported by Brad Zeimer of The Vancouver Sun. He went on to add that Auger's ego cost the Canucks two points, as he made one of the two calls with the game tied 2-2 and 4:45 left in the game. The surprising thing that occurred as the story developed on Tuesday was that all of hockey's most respected analysts, from Bob McKenzie to Darren Dreger, experts who have no ties to Vancouver, were not critical of Burrows and were not accusing him of crying over spilt milk. Rather, they took the view that for Burrows to give such accurate information on the interaction between him and the ref, and in review of the two penalties in question that did very much appear to be "phantom calls", his story probably was based in fact. In examining the story ourselves, and trying to take out as much Vancouver bias as possible, it must be understood that the player's post game comments were made after having some time to consider what the repercussions would be. Every player knows that complaining about the refereeing of a game will most likely lead to a fine and a possible suspension. Despite this, Burrows felt it necessary to make his voice heard – obviously believing his story was important enough that it needed to be exposed. As of Tuesday evening, TSN has reported that the only discipline that will be laid out by the NHL will be a $2,500 fine to Burrows. Apparently they wish for this story that threatens the very integrity of the league, to just go away. One thing is for sure: it won't soon be forgotten in Vancouver.
“They’re too slow.”
“All they do is cycle the puck!”
“They’re just boring to watch.”
Over the years, supporters of the Sedin twins have heard many comments like these, and they haven’t had much of a response. Halfway through the 2009-10 NHL season, Henrik sits atop the NHL leaderboard, tied for the league lead in points scored, yet the same criticisms seem to remain. While it does appear that most of Canuckland has finally bought into the idea that the brothers are legitimate top line players, the conversion is taking longer for fans outside Vancouver.
Maybe it is the fact that they’re tucked all the way out west that has the duo stuck in obscurity, but one figures it has to change at some point. Perhaps Henrik’s statistical achievements will finally start to turn heads. True NHL fans – the ones who see the beauty in watching Joe Thornton manhandling opponents, or Ilya Kovalchuk’s rocket of a slapshot – should appreciate the slick passing game of the twins. There are not many lines in the league that produce pretty plays as often as these two, and they will start to be appreciated as must watch players. You know the kind – Ovechkin, Crosby, Toews, Iginla – when these guys play, we watch games awaiting their next shift. The Sedins, in their 9th full NHL campaigns, are finally creating this sort of buzz.
